The Disillusioned Frog

So, there I was, suddenly awake. Regularly attending church. Going to small groups. Volunteering on Sundays. Surrounded by christians. In the middle of the Bible Belt. Great. Now what? I simply no longer belonged here. I was no longer a christian. I was a freethinker. An agnostic. An... Atheist. It was weird to think that was the right word for me. It always seemed to carry such a negative connotation. But it was accurate in the literal sense. I didn't believe in a god. I was no longer a theist . It was that simple. But could I explain it to others? Would they understand me? Would they even listen? Or would they simply reject me? I began to think back on multiple conversations I had with my wife, Meredith, in our early years. I remembered when she would confess that one of the main reasons she was even interested in dating me was because she learned that I was a christian. I remembered several conversations about how important that was to her, and about how, even thou...

Last week I explained how at the end of a gradual process, I came to the realization that I no longer believed in God. However, I still had one last hurdle to leap, the one I think most doubting Christians stop at. An argument  commonly refe rred to as "Pascal's Wager." In short, the argument is often summed up by Christians as, "it is better to live as if God exists and find out he doesn't, t hen to live as if he doesn't and find out he does." Essentially, if you give up on your faith, you are at a greater risk. If you are wrong, you risk going to Hell and suffering for eternity. Looking back, it is easy to see why many Christians will stop there and turn back, rather than take that last step toward freedom. The argument is built entirely on fear. It's a last-ditch scare tactic, designed to reign people in and make those who refuse to accept God appear foolish. After all, they must not be thinking rationally if they are willing to risk eternal...

I don't actually believe that belief is a choice. Even the Bible is (not very) clear on this. Let's go back to a bible verse I referenced last week: "For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift—not from works, so that no one can boast."  Ephesians 2:8-9 According to this verse, you did not choose to have faith. You did nothing. God graciously gave faith to you. Still don't believe me? Check the list of gifts of the Spirit starting with 1 Corinthians 12:8. Faith is mentioned specifically in verse 9. So, even by Christian doctrine, one can't just choose to have faith. God chooses whether you will believe or not, which determines whether you will go to Hell or not. Your fate is entirely in his hands. You can do absolutely nothing about it, even if you wanted to. Think I'm just taking the Bible out of context? Think you can still choose what you believe in? Let's have a simple test to see whe...

You must not really know me if this is the conclusion you have to jump to. I read an Apologetics Study Bible. I checked every footnote. I researched. I went to two different churches for awhile. I went to Bible study groups. I hosted a church group in our home. I once tried to rewrite the gospels in chronological order. I understood that the only way to be saved was by God's grace, through faith in Jesus Christ. And that this was a gift from God, not by ourselves or from any of our works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9, John 3:16-17). But I also understood that faith without works was dead (James 2:14-17), not because works are important for salvation, but rather because those who believe will be compelled into action. I was no baby Christian. But, in order for me to believe anything , I have to be able to make sense of it, and I genuinely believed in Christianity for years. If something didn't make sense to me, it would nag at the back of my mind and cause me t...

If you spend a good deal of time online, I'm sure you've seen a couple heart-melting videos. A young child of a refugee family is rescued at sea, still breathing. Safe. A toddler is dug out from the debris of a recent earthquake. Barely bruised. A man climbs four stories to save a hanging baby. Both make it to safety. As a parent of two young boys, these stories kick me in the chest and liquefy my eyes. It can't be helped. Surely, these stories are evidence that God cares and has his protective hand over the little children, right? "Alligator Drags 2-Year-Old Boy Into Water Near Disney Resort" This is the headline that appeared on my Flipboard news feed as I flipped through articles to entertain myself during breakfast about two years ago. I clicked the link and held my breath as I read about the family relaxing on the beach on movie night, while their kids waded in the water nearby. I choked back tears as I related with the father, who tried desperat...